Before you walk down the aisle.

There are questions you need to ask yourself to make sure in your heart that she/he is the one. These questions will potentially save you and everyone involved a lot of pain and heartbreak. It may be difficult to be adult enough to stop the wedding before the date, but it will be a huge emotional disaster (and even more costly) to decide just days after the wedding that you made the biggest mistake of your life.

You really need to ask yourself if you are getting married for all the right reasons. Never allow yourself to be pushed into getting married if you are not emotionally ready to give all of yourself to that person. You can not just go along with marriage.
Waiting months, days, or even years to get married is never as heartbreaking as realizing after the fact that you just blew it. If the person you love is not willing to wait, maybe they are not the right person for you.

When you get married, you'll have to decide how you're going to handle financial expenses; a "yours, mine and ours" approach. Set up a joint checking/savings account for paying general household bills and saving for big purchases or vacations. But protect any assets you bring into the marriage -- your trust fund, a condo, large monetary gifts from your parents -- by keeping them in your name.

"People get married and say Honey, I love you so much I'm putting your name on my bank account, and then those co-mingled assets lose their separate property status. In the eyes of the law, you no longer own that separately, keep what was originally yours separate, so you don't risk having to split that in a divorce.

Whether you want to keep or change your name;
Not every woman is keen on giving up a name that reflects her personal and professional identity, heritage and family history. And these days, there are lots of ways to play the name game: Keep the one you've got. Take a hyphenated name. Combine your names into one new one. There's no "right" answer, you just need to know what feels right to you -- and talk to your partner about what's important to him.
Is buying a house at the top your newlywed to-do list? That major purchase generally means taking out a mortgage, and it's critical that you understand the debt that you're taking on as a couple.
Talk to your future spouse about your feelings. If you do not feel comfortable doing so, this could be a warning sign for problems ahead. An honest open relationship is the foundation of a happy marriage. If you do not feel you can talk to him/her about your doubts, if they tell you it’s nothing to worry about, if they react badly, or do not respect your feelings, then you definitely should consider postponing or canceling your wedding.

Sit down and write out all of the reasons you love him/her, your hopes, your dreams, your fears,your doubts, and your dislikes. Listen to your heart and pray about it. Talk about it with a trusted friend or someone who is willing to help you see both sides of the question. Make sure you are able to talk freely with this person to see if marriage is really the way to go.

If you decide after answering all of these questions that you just have a case of cold feet and your life as you know it is not ending, go ahead and plan the wedding. Get yourself prepared for the biggest day of your life.


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